~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
~Part: 21~
Stirring, stretching out with my senses, I pulled away from the delicious darkness and forced my eyes open. Mine. My eyes. No mistaking that. There was still some Willow in there, in that hollowed out shell of a body. The good, sweet soul may have been gone, and big yay for that, but there were still bits of her that mixed and blended with the demon. Willow, she…I wasn't always goodness and light, you know. There was darkness, lurking far back, waiting to be let out. Power, control…She craved them, I craved them. Fear, self-conscious tension…That remained as well, but I knew I'd be able to push that aside easily enough.
Slowly sitting up, I looked down at my body, naked, wrapped in a thin, dark blue sheet. The fabric felt cool against my skin. Or perhaps it was me that was cold. Reaching over to the bedside table, I grabbed a picture frame, holding it before me and running my hands through my hair, as if I could see my reflection in the glass. Giggling, I set the frame back down and let out a content sigh, closing my eyes.
"This will do nicely."
"Having fun?" That voice. That tone. That growl. Angel. Mmm…Sire.
Opening my eyes again, I gave him a sweet, innocent smile, and for a moment, I knew what he was thinking. He thought that she was there, that somehow she had remained.
Foolish vampire.
"I could certainly be having a lot more fun," I told him, sinking back down a little on the pillows and wriggling my hips under the sheets. Running a hand over my stomach, I felt faint scars in place of the wounds I'd been dealt earlier. They were almost completely healed already. Nice advantage to being a demon.
"Wanna play, Daddy?"
The last word was little more than a purr, rolling from my tongue, and I could see him stiffen, in more places than one, and knew the effect I was already having on him. In fact, I could smell the effect, the same as I could scent my own arousal, and I wiggled my hips a little more, spreading my thighs, letting one long, bare leg slip out from under the blanket and licking my lips.
"You must be hungry," he stated, his voice deep and controlled. Standing up, he slipped his hands into his pockets, leaning back against the wall and regarding me coolly.
"Starved," I admitted with a little pout. Reaching out both arms, I held my hands out to him, beckoning him forward.
Slowly, as if to suggest that he was moving solely of his own volition and not because I wanted it, he made his way to the bed, sitting on the far end.
"Gonna feed your girl?" I asked, a sly smile slipping across my lips.
He did not respond, his face revealing nothing of his mood or mind. I found it unsettling.
"Hungry," I whimpered again, letting my true, demonic face slip forth. It felt good. It felt freeing. It felt right.
Angel, apparently, disagreed, wincing as he saw my human mask melt into ripples and fangs and all things evil.
Sniffing the air, I leaned forward, baring my fangs, inching closer to his neck and the sweet Sire's blood that was just beneath the surface.
Closing my eyes, I leaned in further, a growl rumbling deep in my throat. Suddenly, I felt strong hands grip my shoulders, pushing me back, and my eyes snapped open, glaring at the vampire before me.
"Hungry," I growled again.
"Willow…" The word died in his throat, and I knew it killed him to connect that name with what he saw before him. "There are certain rules that we need to go over."
"After," I insisted. "First, feed."
"No, now."
Stupid domineering vampire.
Flopping back on my heels, I crossed my arms and sulked, waiting for him to speak.
"First of all, you're young. You may think that you know everything, but you don't." I simply rolled my golden eyes. This was going to be a fun little lecture. Maybe he'd been taking lessons from Giles. "For now, what I say goes, got it?" I glared at him, not bothering to answer. "Willow-"
Another low growl erupted from deep inside my diaphragm and I smiled at my new ability. Angel didn't look pleased.
"Fine, yes, I understand. What daddy says goes. Eat now?"
Angel shook his head, running a hand through his hair. "There are certain other rules of etiquette that vampires heed," he explained. "You want blood, you ask for it. You don't just take it, not from your sire. And while we're at it, you will not feed from anyone while you are under my roof, understand? Not Cordelia, not Doyle-"
"What about you?" I purred, watching as he closed his eyes for a moment and swallowed.
"Only with my permission. For now, you drink this."
Reaching down next to the bed, he lifted up a chilled bag of blood and my face crinkled in disgust.
"I won't drink that. Just because you lower yourself to-"
"Watch your mouth, childe," he warned, emitting his own warning growl. It made mine sound like a kitten's cry. "It's this or nothing."
Turning my head away, I crossed my arms again, my nose turned up in defiance. "I'll take nothing then."
"Willow- "
Standing up, he threw the bag down on the bed and started pacing.
"Why do you have to make this difficult?"
"It wouldn't be any fun otherwise," I told him with a sweet smile, slowing slipping from the bed, my face melting back into the human mask as the sheet slipped from my body. Closing my eyes for a moment, I enjoyed the feel of cool air against my bared skin, stretching before grabbing a silk robe that had been laid out on the bed and slipping into it, only loosely tying the belt. "Besides, admit it, Sire, you like it a little bit difficult."
Stepping up behind him, I wrapped my arms around him, my nails scraping along the fabric covering his chest.
"There are other rules that vampires follow too, aren't there, Angel?" I whispered, leaning up and nipping at his earlobe. He jumped a little, but didn't move away. "I remember reading about sire and childe relationships. Mmm…very steamy from what I recall."
"N-not always," he mumbled, arching a little into my touch as I slowly licked at his ear and ran my tongue down his neck.
"But that's the best part, isn't it?" My voice was so soft. Even a vampire would have had to strain to hear it. I liked that.
Slowly, quietly, I let my fangs and ridges slip back out as I ran my tongue once again over his delicious neck. Rearing my head back a little, I bared my fangs, salivating at the thought of sinking them into his flesh and feeding from the older vampire.
"I don't know," he replied, his voice suddenly changing. It was stronger, more confident…arrogant, almost.
Shit.
Spinning around, he gripped my wrist in one hand, the back of my neck in the other, shoving me to the floor before I was even aware of his movements. I struggled and writhed beneath his hold, but his grip on my neck only tightened, my arm bending back painfully.
"I always thought punishing a childe was pretty great, too."
"Bastard," I spat.
"You're making this more difficult for yourself than it needs to be."
"Go to hell, Daddy!" The last word dripped with disdain.
"Already been there, sweetheart. Not in a rush to go back. Are you?"
"What do you want?" I sobbed, tears springing into my eyes as he bent my arm back a little further.
"Your submission," he growled. "And could we stop with the daddy thing? It's creeping me out."
"Fine! Fine! I submit! I'll drink the damn bagged blood!"
In an instant, he was off of me, and I was pushing myself up onto the bed, cradling my sore arm with the other hand. I watched as he reached over, picking up the bag of blood and holding it out to me, my jaw clenching and popping.
Reaching out, I grabbed the bag, pulling it away and grumbling under my breath, "Stupid, strong vampire. Thinks he's so great."
Angel chuckled, which just served to further piss me off.
Ripping open the bag, I sniffed, scowling. It smelled awful, and it wasn't even warm.
My head still down, I glanced up through my long lashes for a moment, before suddenly flinging my arm out, throwing the cold blood in his face.
Stunned, Angel stumbled backwards, wiping at his eyes, his true features slipping forward. Jumping up, I kicked out, catching him in the gut and sending him flying back into a dresser. His movements were faster than I could see and before I knew it, he was before me again, his strong fist striking out and connecting with my jaw, sending me reeling backwards, onto the floor. In an instant, he was on me, holding me down, growling, fangs bared, and I growled right back. I may have sounded like a kitten, but this was one kitten that wasn't going down without a fight.
Using every bit of strength in me, I arched up, wrapping a bare leg around his and flipping us, enjoying the shocked expression on his face for just a moment before I lunged down, sinking my fangs into his neck.
The taste of Sire's blood is indescribable. It's like nothing else in this world, or any other, for that matter. Sucking and slurping, I luxuriated in the feel of the powerful blood slipping down my throat. It was divine.
Wriggling against him, I heard the other vampire groan as he arched up into me. The belt of the robe had slipped open and I could feel his shirt against my bare chest.
I purred as I swallowed gulp after gulp, feeling his power fill me. After a few moments, the powerful feeling in my gut began to grow, change, morphing into a burning pain. Gasping, I pulled back, looking into Angel's glazed eyes before my own rolled back and I began clawing at my chest as a mind-numbing pain washed over me.
My knees still on either side of his prone body, I fell back, screaming as I felt the fire burn through me, ripping me apart.
As it finally subsided, I sat up, gasping and panting, rubbing at my blurry eyes. Angel looked on, saying nothing, his expression unreadable. Glancing down, I suddenly noticed my lack of clothing, the robe wide open and slipping down one arm. Jumping back and scurrying away from him, I quickly pulled the thin silk closed, my body shaking, my mind confused.
"Willow ," he said softly, slowly moving toward me.
"No!" I yelled, holding my hand up. "Don't! I…" Looking up at my hand, I saw a bit of blood staining the pale skin. Oh god. Reaching up, I felt my face, my fingers running over the bumps and ridges, examining the sharp teeth and wiping at my moist lips. Pulling my hand away, I looked again, seeing fresh blood there and swallowing hard. Looking back at Angel, I saw two ragged holes in his neck, blood slowly oozing from them.
Following my eyes, Angel reached up and ran his hands over his own neck, looking at the blood for a moment before shaking his head. "No, Willow, it's okay. You didn't…"
"Oh god," I murmured under my breath. "I'm…I'm…"
Suddenly standing up, I ran toward the door. Angel jumped, ready to stop me from leaving, but paused as he watched me. Stopping in front of the door, I peering into the mirror that hung over the back of it, shocked at what I saw…or rather, what I didn't see.
Lifting a hand, I touched the mirror gingerly, almost expecting it to disappear. But no, it was there, real and true. It was me that was not.
Running my fingers over the place where my face should have been, I felt a tear slip down my cheek. "I'm…I'm dead. I…"
Spinning around, I startled the other vampire. "I'm dead! I…I did that! I did that to you! Oh god, I'm…"
"Willow , it's okay," he said, taking a step closer, but I quickly moved the other way, flopping gracelessly onto the bed, staring at the blood on my hands.
"Okay? It's…it's okay?" How could he say that? "How can you say that? How is it possibly okay? I'm a…a.." I couldn't bear to say it. "Look at what I did to you. Are you alright?" I reached toward his neck, but he leaned back, out of the way as he sat next to me, gripping one of my shaking hands tightly in his.
"It will be okay, Willow, I promise."
Biting my lip, I wiped at the tears slipping from my eyes, absently streaking a bit of blood over my cheeks.
"I'm a…a…a"
"Vampire," he supplied, the word spoken slowly and carefully.
"Yes, thank you. I'm a…that?" He nodded. "A-and you, you know, turned me?" Again, he nodded. "So…So I'm evil. How…how come I don't feel evil?"
The dark haired vampire chuckled a little, squeezing my hand. "You have your soul back," he told me.
"Oh. That's a…it's a good thing, right?"
"A very good thing," he replied with a grin. "Believe me."
"Angel, I'm so sorry that I…"
"No, Willow , I'm sorry. You deserve better than this. I hope you don't hate me for-"
"Hate you? How could I hate you? You saved me."
"Not exactly."
"Well, I'm still here, right? More or less, so…"
"But you have a demon to deal with now, and immortality and new powers and blood lust and-"
"Spike!"
"Well, yeah, and Spike."
"No, I mean, can…can I see him?"
"Not yet, Willow. When you're ready, you can see him. I promise."
"Okay," I relented, looking down for a moment before looking back up. "Will I be ready soon?"
Again, he chuckled. Apparently I'm very amusing when I'm completely lost.
"Yes, soon."
"Today?"
"No, Will, not today."
"How...how will I know when I'm ready? A-and ready for what?"
"It's going to be an adjustment, this lifestyle. It will be hard at first, for both of you. Spike will have certain urges, especially when he's close and can feel the demon in you. I don't want you to be in a position you aren't ready for. Things work...differently, even with sex, once your a vampire."
I'd noticed.
Letting out a sigh, I slipped my hand from his and pulled the robe a little tighter around me.
"This isn't over, you know," I told him.
It was his turn to sigh. "Yeah, I know."
"I want them dead. All of them." I could hear the venom slip into my tone as I spoke, my eyes narrowing, flickering between green and gold. "I want them to suffer and I want them to die. Especially Maggie Walsh."
"By gods and demons, I will give you what you want, Childe," Angel stated, in a low, lethal tone.
"And I want to be the one that kills her."
~Part: 22~
My soul was back. I want to be clear about that. The soul of Willow Rosenberg, full of humanity and good will, was once again inhabiting my body, but it wasn't the only occupant. There was a demon inside as well. Still is, and always will be, I suppose, as long as I walk, talk and…well, as long as I walk and talk, but it's something that many people will easily forget. I'm a demon, first and foremost, and forgetting that, for even a moment, can cost you dearly.
My first few days as a demon were nothing to write home about. There were no great, memorable killing sprees. There were no nights of scintillating debauchery. There was no screaming, no begging, no tears that fell…except for my own, of course, and even they were quickly reigned in. I might have been newly made, and I certainly didn't understand all the rules, but I knew, instinctively, that showing weakness, of any kind, in front of my sire was not a good thing. Not only did my tears drag forth that pained look of guilt and regret in his eyes, but the demon inside raged against the very idea that the one who made me should see even an ounce of weakness. Besides, the quicker that Angel believed I was "better", the sooner I'd be able to see Spike. And at the moment, that was all that mattered.
I didn't understand what it was like, being a demon, my survival dependant on the death of others. It was both horrifying and glorious at the same time. A strength ran through me, more powerful than anything I'd ever imagined. At the same time, I felt incredibly vulnerable, depending on Angel to feed me and protect me. Even now, the very thought of it sickens me. Never the less, I was a baby, so to speak, and despite my newfound strength, I was helpless against so many enemies.
The sun. That was, perhaps, the most difficult enemy to accept. Still is. Living in Sunnydale, patrolling with the slayer, avoiding the ever-present danger of late night strolls and darkened alleys, I'd come to regard the sun as my ally. It protected me from the very thing that I had become, and suddenly, instead of running to it and basking in its glow, I hid, shielding my face, cowering from it's warming rays. It rejected me, as did holy objects like crosses and blessed water, and that was how I knew, with absolute certainty, and despite every objection and argument that Angel made…I was…I am, an evil thing.
"Do you think of me that way? Have you ever?" Angel had a point, I suppose. He was a friend. He was one of the good guys, before my black and white world suddenly turned very gray.
"My perspective has changed somewhat."
I was sitting on the side of the bed, my bare legs dangling over the edge like a child's. The room was quiet and dark, a few rays of orange light filtering in through a small break in the drapes. The sun was setting. I could feel it deep inside, an internal demon alarm clock, incessantly beeping. It made me antsy and uneasy, and I itched to go outside.
A few minutes earlier, Angel had been yelling, angry and violent and extremely frightening. It had stirred a mix of emotions in me, many of which I was not even close to ready to deal with. Then, suddenly, he was all somber and understanding. The mood swings were driving me almost as crazy as the four walls of the tiny room I'd been confined to.
"What the hell is wrong with you?" he'd yelled, yanking me away from the window, gripping my burned arm tightly.
"Ow, Angel, it hurts," I'd whined, trying to pull away.
As he dragged me to the adjoining bathroom, I clutched the large towel around me tightly. I had just come from the shower, my wet hair dangling loosely around my face, and he might have been my sire, but I wasn't ready for him to see all of my charms just yet.
Shoving me toward the sink, he grabbed a towel and ran it under cold water, pressing it to my burned flesh. I hissed, closing my eyes, aroused by the pain and sickened by my arousal.
"Stop it," he growled.
My eyes flew open. "Stop what? Sizzling? Because, you know that if I could I-"
"You know that I can smell your…" he trailed off, thank GOD.
If I'd been able to blush, I would have, I'm sure. "I don't mean to," I mumbled meekly, pulling the wet towel from his hands and holding it to my burned arm.
Glaring at me for a moment, Angel turned and stormed out of the bathroom. I trailed behind him, watching as he paced the room. I could feel his anger, though I didn't understand it.
"What the hell is wrong with you? Huh? You know the rules, Willow. You know how it works. Sunlight, plus vampire equals dust!"
He was right. He was, and it had been stupid of me to go to the window; incredibly stupid. But I still didn't understand why he was so angry.
"I'm sorry," I insisted. "I just…I forgot."
"You forgot?! Willow, you…You can't just…Damn it!" Throwing his hands up, he continued his pacing and I sat down on the bed, shrinking away from him.
"I…I don't understand why you're so mad. I just…I made a mistake, and I'm sorry."
Letting out a sigh, he sank down onto the bed next to me.
"Let me see the burn."
"Are you going to hurt me again?" I whispered.
He frowned, shaking his head, and I removed the small hand towel, letting him look it over. I glanced down at the skin, amazed to see that it was already healing.
"You have to be more careful," he told me, as if I hadn't already figured that out. "If anything happened to you, I don't know what I would…I mean, Spike would kill me."
I looked up at him, biting my lower lip.
"Sorry."
"It's not just that," he added, taking my hand and rubbing it. He'd done that a lot in the last few days, soothing my nerves. I idly wondered how he knew that would help. "I care about you, Willow, deeply. You're my childe. I don't want to see you hurt, or…"
"I get it," I told him. "I'm sorry. I'll be more careful. I just…I still forget, you know, what I am, and I don't understand why you seem to care so much about me."
Something in the way I'd said that made his expression change, and I immediately regretted speaking.
"Why I care about you? Willow, you're-""
"-a bad thing," I whispered.
"Bad thing?" he repeated, raising an eyebrow.
"You know what I mean. Not being able to go in the sun? It's…I'm evil. That's hard to get used to."
His eyes narrowed and I knew I was in for a lecture. Angry, protective Angel was now concerned Angel. You see what I mean about the mood swings? Frustrating!
"Do you think of me that way? Have you ever?"
"My perspective has changed somewhat."
There was a long, empty pause, and I wished he would just leave and let me have a good cry.
"Just because there is badness in us, doesn't make us bad creatures. You are still kind and you are still loving and you are still deserving of affection."
"I'm evil, Angel! We're evil! Why couldn't you be with Buffy? Huh? Because, ultimately, you're the embodiment of evil and she's the protector of everything innocent and good! We're bad. Even with the soul, we're not capable of giving or receiving love, and even if we were, we hardly deserve it."
I swallowed hard before continuing, fighting to keep the tears from my eyes. One thought had been plaguing my mind since my turning…One thought that I'd not allowed to pass my lips…My best friends, Buffy, Xander…They would hate me. They would have no choice but to hate me.
"I want to kill people. Do you know that? I mean, I don't want to, cause I know it's wrong, and…God, that would just be…I don't even know what that would be, but I want to. I heard Cordelia downstairs this morning, and I came out of my room. I know I wasn't supposed to, but I did, and I slipped down the hall and I looked into the lobby, and I could hear it. I could hear her heart beating and the blood rushing, and god help me, I wanted nothing more than to run down there and rip her throat out. I wanted to bite into her neck and drink until there wasn't a drop of blood left. I wanted that, Angel. I didn't just think about it. It wasn't just some random thought in my head. I wanted it. Me. Willow. I wanted to kill her."
"But you didn't."
"But I wanted to, so badly, and someone who thinks things like that…there can't be anything good about me."
Unable to look at him anymore, I glanced down at my pale hands, waiting for him to reply. It felt like an eternity as the silence stretched on before he stood up, walking to the door.
"Where are you going?" I asked, panic and fear in my voice. "Aren't you…Don't you have some great reassuring speech or something?"
"Would you believe me?"
I didn't answer. I had no idea what the truth really was.
"I think it's time," he told me, his hand on the doorknob. I gave him a questioning look. "I think you're ready to see Spike."
My face lit up. I know it did, even without a reflection to see. Standing up, I took a few steps toward him, eyes wide.
"Really? I can see him? Now? I don't understand why you-"
"It's time," he told me, turning the knob and opening the door. "I need to talk to him, first, but I'll send him in as soon as I'm done."
I nodded enthusiastically. I didn't understand the decision or the timing, but I certainly wasn't going to complain. I was going to see Spike, finally.
I was excited, for exactly five seconds, and then I wanted to throw up, suddenly filled with a brand new fear. I was going to see Spike, and I had no idea what his reaction to the changes in me would be.
~*~
"I'm sure that there is a perfectly good explanation for what you saw."
"Giles, they had Willow. She wasn't moving, and there was a pretty sever bite mark on her neck. Angel was all vampy and there was blood all over her."
"I know what you saw, Buffy, but-"
"That son of a bitch. I knew that eventually…If you had gotten rid of your boyfriend, permanently, when you should have, this wouldn't be-"
"Xander, that's not helping."
"Right, but standing here and discussing the matter, that's the answer to everything, isn't it?"
"What do you suggest?"
"We go to L.A. and we confront Angel. If the guy's gone evil, we take him out. If Willow's dead…we'll…we'll deal with it then."
"What if she's worse than dead?"
"Anya?"
"Well, I'm just saying what no one else wants to. If she's undead, are you ready to take her out too?"
"Let's just hope that it doesn't come to that."
~*~
It felt like an eternity. In reality, it had been about twenty minutes, providing plenty of time for me to try on every article of clothing in my limited wardrobe, comb out my hair and clumsily dry it in front a mirror with no reflection, and then experiment with every possible place and position I could be in when he came through the door.
I was attempting to look casual and relaxed on the bed when I heard a knock and jumped up, yelling for him to come in.
I watched, a few feet from the entrance, as the door slowly opened and his head peered around the corner. I expected a smile or a wave, or at least some sign that he was glad to see me, but his features held no expression as he walked in, shutting the door behind him.
I stood awkwardly in the middle of the room, watching him watch me as he came closer. My thoughts and emotions were etched on my face. They always had been, and I was sure that he knew exactly what was going through my head. I, on the other hand, was having an incredibly difficult time understanding my own brain, and his was a complete mystery, as usual.
I felt odd and out of place, and increasingly nervous. Why wasn't he saying something? Anything? Dear god!
"Red." Finally! It wasn't much, but it was something, and that one simple word was all it took.
Running to close the small gap between us, I threw myself into his arms, tears leaking from my eyes as I buried my face in his chest. The feel of him, the scent of him…It was overwhelming. I was drowning, and I didn't care. The last thing that I wanted at that moment was a lifejacket, lest I be dragged away from such a sweet demise.
Finally, I pulled back, though I did not let go, and looked upon his face for the first time with my enhanced vision, taking him in as I listened to the silent static around us.
"I missed you so much," I whispered, nuzzling his neck.
He leaned back a bit, holding me at arms length and looked at me; really looked at me. I frowned, not sure what he would see and how he would like it. As usual, his expression gave no hint as to what he was thinking, and I ducked my head a little, the silence suddenly deafening.
"I'm sorry."
That wasn't what I was expecting. Maybe I should have, but I didn't. He was sorry. Sorry that I'd been reborn? Sorry that it hadn't been him to do it? Sorry that his feelings had changed?
"It should have been me."
I shook my head, but he didn't give me a chance to argue.
"You're magnificent. You're beyond beautiful, and you should have been mine. Now, as it is-"
"I'm still yours, Spike," I insisted, silencing him with a finger to his lips. "I always will be." He wanted to argue, I could tell, but I wasn't in the mood for a debate.
The kiss was sudden, and startling, even though I'd been the one to initiate it. We connected and the world disappeared. Nothing existed but us; our lips, soft and moist; his hands, hard and strong; my fingers, cool and anxious; his heart, dead and still; my soul, full and alive.
Nothing else existed, and in that moment, I knew, with absolute certainty, that I would dive into the deepest depths of hell in order to keep this creature by my side.
~Part: 23~
"Are you sure about this? I mean, are you sure that I'm ready for, you know, the rest of the world? It's kind of a big step, and-"
"Willow, you're ready." Angel sounded reassuring, he did, but I was still having trouble believing him.
"What if I get out there, and I see all the people, and I hear all their little hearts beating in their little chest, and…and…what if I just, you know, go…BLAH!" I shouted, flailing my arms around.
Angel chuckled. "You wont `go blah', Willow, I promise. Besides, you were the one that insisted on picking out the new hard drive yourself. Cordy was perfectly willing to do it."
I rolled my eyes. She may have been great at picking out a dress, but when it came to computers, god only knew what she'd come home with. "Angel, there would be a cute sales guy there, and she'd start flirting, and he'd get her to buy some piece of crap drive that didn't even go with our system." I was whining. It was true, but stress will do that to me. "Besides, if someone is going to flirt with the sales guy, it should be me. At least I know what to try and get out of him."
I smiled and waggled my eyebrows. It was a joke, supposed to funny. Angel didn't see it that way.
I heard a low growl and I backed up a bit.
"Why the sudden growly-ness?"
"It's…it's just you, and the talk about flirting with the…I don't like it." Chalk that up to one more thing about Angel that I did not get.
"You know I was kidding, right? I mean, me and Spike, we're…"
"Yeah, uh, what exactly is going on with you two?"
"Uh, well, we're, you know, getting reacquainted and stuff. He doesn't wanna push me into anything until I'm ready."
"That's good," he told me with a sigh of relief. "That's really good."
A thought suddenly struck me, and I narrowed my eyes a little. "Angel, did you say something to him about, you know, intimate stuff?"
"What? No! I wouldn't…Well, I might have said SOMETHING, but…You're my childe, Willow. Normally, I'd be the one to…But this time it's different. I know that you love Spike, and I won't interfere with that, as long as he treats you well, but I can't say it's the easiest thing in the world, seeing you and knowing that I can't have you."
I smiled softly. "Thank you, Angel, for…well, everything. I'm sorry if it's difficult. I'll try to be as unappealing as possible, if it'll help."
The older vampire cracked a smile and pulled me to him for a quick hug, before returning to the topic at hand.
"Ready to go?" My uneasy smile was convincing no one. "It's just a few blocks to the store. What could possibly happen between here and there?"
I gave him a pointed look.
"Right, I'll grab my throwing axe, just in case."
Walking to the entrance of the lobby, I placed my hand on the doorknob, hesitating before turning it.
"Well, look at you!"
Hearing the voice behind me, I jumped with a squeal, spinning around, my demonic features coming forth. A second later, Doyle jumped back, yelling as well, and pulling the leather desk chair out, rolling it in front of him, using it as a shield.
"Doyle! Hey, I…Willow!" Angel yelled, running over to me as I growled, blowing a bit of hair out of my face. "Willow, calm down, it's just Doyle."
I took a few deep breaths, closing my eyes and slowly willing my human mask back into place, relief flooding me as I felt the fangs and ridges disappear.
"I was just surprised to see you heading out the door," Doyle explained, still holding the chair between us. "I didn't mean to…"
"I…I'm sorry," I whispered, looking up at Angel. "He just, I mean, I was startled, and…"
"S'ok," Doyle assured me. "I always say that a heart needs a good scare now and then to make sure it's still tick'n."
"You see?" I shouted, stepping away from the door. "I'm not ready. If I can lose it that easily, what will I do if I get around a crowd and-"
"Willow, he startled you. You're jumpy. It's understandable. I'll be right here, by your side. I won't allow you to hurt anyone. Okay?" I nodded slowly, looking down at my shaking hands. Angel reached out, gently tilting my chin up to force my eyes on his again. "I won't let anyone hurt you either. You know that, right?" Again, I nodded, swallowing hard, fighting back the tears.
"I know," I whispered.
"You trust me, right?"
"Yes."
"Then let's go." He held out his hand, waiting patiently as I stared at it, contemplating my choices. Finally, I shook my head, trying to release a little tension in my neck and back, and placed my small hand in his, allowing him to lead me out the door.
We'd only made it about a block down the street when a familiar voice started shouting behind us.
"Hold up!" Spike yelled, running toward us. "Just where do you two think you're go'n?"
Angel arched an eyebrow. "Didn't realize I had to ask permission to leave the hotel."
"No, but if you were taking Red here, you might have-"
"She's my childe, Spike. I don't have to run everything I do with her by you."
I sighed, stepping back. Just what we needed, another fight between alpha male number one and alpha male number two.
"You know, she may be your childe, but she's my-"
"Your what, Spike? Huh? What exactly is she?"
"Enough!" I shouted, startling even myself. Stepping between the two vampires, I held my arms out, pushing them back. "Both of you, just stop! I can't take the fighting anymore. Yes, I'm your childe, Angel, and yes, I'm your lover, Spike…" Of course that just caused Angel to growl more. "A-and you're both just going to have to figure out a way to get along." Turning to Spike, I leaning in and up on my toes, kissing him. "I love you, Spike," I whispered, "but I need to do this with Angel. Please understand."
He frowned, looking away, and nodded grudgingly as I looked toward Angel, seeing him smirk.
"And you!" The grin immediately fell and he had the grace to look slightly ashamed of himself. "Give him a break, okay? You're not easy to compete with."
Spike opened up his mouth, ready to argue my last point, but I quickly stopped him with another kiss and a gentle push. "Go home," I whispered. "I'll be back soon."
"No, Spike, wait," Angel interrupted, before looking toward me. "Let him take you to the store."
"Really?"
This time it was the older vampire that nodded, grudgingly. "I know you'll keep her safe," he told the blond.
"Are you sure?" I asked, my voice soft and a little nervous.
Again, he nodded, this time with a small smile, pulling out his wallet and handing me a credit card. "Just don't let Spike buy anything," he whispered with a wink.
~*~
"Angel! You're back! Good, because I just got a phone call from a Rupert Giles. He wanted to give ya a heads up that Buffy and some guy named Xander are on there way here, and if I'm calculate'n correctly, they should be arriving just about-"
"Where the hell is she?"
"Buffy, always so nice of you to drop by. We haven't seen you in ages. Why don't we sit down and have a little girl talk, and then maybe we could-"
"Where is she?"
"Buffy, if you would just put down the weapons and…"
"I'm not going to ask again, Angel. I want to see Willow, right now, with my own eyes."
"She's not here. No amount of weaponry'll make the girl materialize before us."
"Where is she?"
"She's out."
"That's not really a direct answer, Dead boy."
"Harris-"
"I want to see her, Angel. Now."
"Well, that's not really possible, at the moment. She's-"
"Dead?"
"What? Xander…"
"Is she dead?"
"Not exactly."
"You killed her!"
"Buffy, you don't understand what happened. Let's just sit down and-"
"We've talked enough, Angel, and I'm already pretty sure I know the back-story. Willow's dead and you killed her."
Silence.
"No rebuttal?"
Silence.
"Then I guess there really is nothing more to say."
"You know, you have a lot of nerve, barging in here, waving your weapons around, especially after you were the ones that…"
"Cordy!"
"What? Someone's got to say it, and it's not as if you're about to."
"I can handle this. Everything is under control."
"Buffy?"
"Willow?"
"Slayer."
"Spike?"
"Willow?"
"Xander?"
"Shit."
~Part: 24~
"He was flirting with you," Spike grumbled as we walked out of the store. Glancing up, I felt a few cold ran drops splash onto my face as it began to drizzle.
"So?"
"So? So?! I was stand'n right there!"
"I don't understand what the big deal is." That wasn't exactly true. I understood. He was jealous. But that didn't give him the right to growl and flash fang, scaring the guy nearly out of his skin.
"The big deal is that you're mine, and he bloody well knew it."
Stopping, I turned, kissing the blond vampire, my lips curving into a smile as I felt some of the tension melt away from him.
"I am yours," I whispered. "Isn't knowing that enough?"
He grumbled something unintelligible under his breath and had the grace to look slightly ashamed of his behavior.
My grip tightened on the newly purchased package as his arms wrapped around me, pulling me closer, his tongue sweeping past my lips. It wasn't until several minutes later that he released me, a sharp crack of thunder shaking the ground a second before the heavens opened and the drizzle turned into a downpour.
Pulling the small bag from me, Spike tucked it into his coat. Grabbing my hand, he gave me one more kiss before we took off running.
In a matter of moments, we'd reached the hotel. Stopping on the front walkway, we looked at each other, rain soaked and smiling, and I giggled, feeling a sense of freedom and relief that I hadn't known for weeks.
"I love you," I whispered, before finding myself once again wrapped in his arms. Rain pounded the ground around us, but in his embrace, I felt safe and protected, even from the torrential elements surrounding us. For just a moment, time stopped, and it was just me and him, alone, unhunted, unharmed and completely in love. It was perfection, if only for a moment.
"Let's get you inside," he reluctantly whispered, taking my hand again and leading me to the hotel. Opening the door, he held it as I walked through and stopped just inside, my dead heart dropping in my chest, my body going stiff.
"Buffy?"
The word was barely a whisper on my lips. As I stood, my eyes swept over the group of people, small drops of water dripping from my soaked hair and slack hands, pattering on the floor. I saw the long blonde hair. I watched her turn, expression changing from startled to cold as I felt a single rain drop make a chilling descent down my neck. I looked at the man next to her. Xander. My best friend. I vaguely heard my own voice utter his name, drops of water slipping down into my eyes and blurring my vision. I blinked them free, wincing as pain flashed in his eyes…Pain at seeing me…At what I'd become. And then I saw HIM…Riley. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I was reminded of the fact that he'd helped us escape, but I saw his face, his strong stance that screamed "soldier-in-training," and those camouflage pants…That image, mingling with the scent of the slayer was too much…and I lost it.
Feeling the vampire features slip forward, I heard myself growl as I felt a rumble deep in my chest. My hands clenched at my side, I felt my control slipping. I was losing it, and fast. Taking a step forward, I saw the slayer draw a stake from her coat pocket and move toward me.
Hissing and growling, I took another step forward. I was faintly aware of the sounds of other voices shouting, but at the moment, Buffy and I were the only creatures that mattered.
I sniffed the air, inhaling her scent and I felt the demon rage within. She was no longer my friend. She was the slayer, and at that moment I wanted nothing more than to sink my fangs into her neck and suck her dry.
Releasing one more growl, I lunged forward with more speed and strength than I knew I had, teeth bared and aimed toward her throat. I was running on pure instinct...and it felt good...it felt right, and it scared the hell out of me. I saw the wooden stake flash before me, but I didn't care. Her blood was calling to me. I wanted to taste her, to listen to her heart as it beat for the last time and feel her die in my grasp. Nothing else mattered.
My fingers curled around her arms, my grip solid, and I leaned in toward her neck, her scent overwhelming my scenes. Feeling a sudden, sharp pain, I gasped as another pair of hands grabbed my shoulders, yanking me backwards, away from the slayer.
Spinning me around, Angel shoved me into the far wall, and I winced as my back connected with the unyielding stone. I struggled to stay on my feet as my knees buckled, and he grabbed my arms, holding me firmly in place. I could see nothing but his face as he leaned in, nearly nose to nose with me, and I closed my eyes, hearing the cacophony of voices in the room, cold drops of water slipping down the tangled hair that hung in my face, spashing on my cheeks.
"What the hell was that?" Buffy yelled. "Angel, I-"
"Shut up," he growled over his shoulder, turning back toward me. "Willow, look at me." My eyes remained closed as the realization of what had just happened hit me. "Look at me, now!"
My head snapped up, and I looked into my sire's eyes, my own once again green and now filled with tears. I shook my head, my mouth open, though no words made it to my lips.
"She's…she's really…I'm…She's…" The sound of Xander's voice was enough to break me, and I began to shake in Angel's grasp. I heard Spike growl something as several more voices began to shout, and I tried to block it all out, focusing on Angel…My sire…His scent, his voice, his eyes, his hands.
"Help me," I whispered, fighting the demon within as it screamed for release. "Please, Angel…"
"Spike!" he shouted, turning his head, but not releasing my arms. A second later, the blond was beside him, looking me over, his eyes filled with concern. "Take her back to her room," he instructed. "Calm her down and keep her there."
Spike didn't say a word, simply nodding once before reaching out and scooping me. A part of me wanted to protest being carried like a small child or an invalid, but instead I gave into the small comfort, wrapping my arms around his neck and inhaling deeply as I nuzzled his throat.
"Take care of her," Angel said in a soft voice, before turning back toward the unwelcome guests. "You shouldn't have come here," he told them, his voice turning hard.
"She nearly killed me!" I heard Buffy shout the words, anger and disgust in her voice, and I cowered a little closer to Spike, feeling him ascend the stairs. "She nearly ripping my throat out and you two are coddling her like a baby!"
"Buffy," Xander said, his voice shaking. "It's Willow…She didn't…"
"Only because he stopped her. She doesn't have a soul, Xander. It's not Willow anymore." I bit my lip, tasting my own blood as tears leaked from my eyes, her words hurting more than she could have imagined.
"Let me make one things clear," Angel said. "If you had staked her, I would have killed you myself." I heard the venom in his voice and knew that it was true, a small part of me beaming at the love that drove those words, even as I cried over everything that was happening.
I heard Angel sigh as we reached the top of the staircase and began to head down the hall. "Sit down, Buffy," he said. "We have a lot to talk about."
~Part: 25~
I was cold and shaking, several raindrops still clinging to my damp skin. Spike was beside me on the bed. I could hear him, talking, whispering, but the words sounded foreign, and I couldn't wrap my head around what he was saying. My eyes were looking forward, but I was seeing nothing…nothing but Xander's pain and Buffy's rage. I swallowed hard, fighting down the nausea that was building inside me.
"Willow?" The sound of my name pulled me from my wretched haze, and I looked toward the blond. "We need to get you out of these clothes, before you catch your…"
His voice trailed off, but I knew what he was going to say.
"Catch my death?" I whispered, my voice trembling. He opened his mouth, ready to deny it, but we both knew the truth. I shook my head. "Too late for that."
"There are worse things than being undead," he said, his voice suddenly harsh. "You could be gone forever."
"At least then…At least I wouldn't have to see…" I broke down, crying again. I'd done so much crying, I idly wondered at how I had any tears left.
Grabbing my hand, he slowly pulled me from the soft bed, and I whimpered, following him without a fight as he led me to the bathroom. I sat on the covered toilet while he ran the water, waiting as the room slowly filled with steam, and then stood, mindlessly moving as directed while he undressed first himself and then me before we both stepped into the shower.
Hot water cascaded down my back, as my head hung forward, my eyes closed. Tears continued to cascade down my cheeks, mingling with the steaming spray and I leaned forward, resting my forehead against his shoulder. I felt his arms wrap around me and I looked up, my lips meeting his in a sudden rush of need and love and too many other emotions to name.
Spike ran his hands down my arms, his fingers dancing along my skin, before trailing up my back. Sliding them through my hair, he pulled me in deeper. I was lost and I was thankful. Maybe this time I would never be found.
We kissed and touched, our bodies melting into one as my need for him rose. I didn't have to say a word. He understood what I wanted, what I needed, and gave me everything.
Spinning me, suddenly, he slammed my back into the wall and I gasped, my demonic features slipping forth. As a fang nicked my lip, I felt a rush of horror…at how I looked, at what I was, at who I'd become. I looked up at Spike, and what I saw shocked me.
Reaching a hand up, I ran it along the ridges above his yellow eyes, and down a rough cheek. As he grinned, I saw his fangs, mesmerized by them. I knew that he was seeing the same on me…My ridges and ripples, my golden eyes, my small, sharp fangs…And yet, his eyes, his expression, his very being transmitted the love that he felt for me…Love that was more powerful than anything I'd every felt before.
I sighed as he nuzzled my throat before his lips once again captured my own, the tang of blood now playing on my tongue as fangs scraped and pulled tender skin. I could taste him…and in him, Angel…and at that moment, I was whole…I was complete…I was loved.
"So beautiful," he murmured. "So bloody beautiful."
"Make love to me, Spike," I whispered, nipping at his throat. It was an expression I'd never used before…Making love, but that was what I wanted and that was what it would be…Love.
Wrapping a strong arm around me, he hoisted me up, my legs wrapping around his waist, and for once I was thankful that we did not need to breath…Even the need for oxygen could not have pulled me from his lips at that moment.
He paused, for one eternal moment, before a single, powerful thrust brought us together, and I was in heaven. He started a strong, steady rhythm as our lips and tongues dueled for control, hands gripping and exploring our heated flesh.
I felt myself rise higher and higher, and just before falling over the edge, I jerked my head to the side, biting into his throat, the taste of him filling my mouth as all of the pain and tension within me exploded. I felt him bite me and we came, as one, growling and screaming, because we were animals…And crying…because we were so much more.
~*~
"We have a location on them, Ma'am. The slayer is with them…And Finn."
"That IS unfortunate, but I'm afraid that Agent Finn is already lost to us."
"We are detecting three hostiles at room temp, Ma'am."
"Yes, I suspected that they might have turned her. It makes no difference. The mission will continue as planned. Prepare your men."
~*~
Running a comb through my hair, I smiled as I felt Spike step up behind me, sliding a hand under my robe as he kissed his mark on my neck.
"Again?" I asked with a grin. "You have to give a girl a little time to recover. Besides, Angel will…"
"Sod Angel…Sod the slayer…Sod the bloody world. It's just you and me, and if…" Interrupted by a knock at the door, he rolled his eyes and sighed. "Hold that thought."
Watching as he went to the door, I felt a cold wave of dread wash over me. My friends were down stairs, waiting, and I was going to have to face them eventually. Unforunately, I had no idea what to say to them.
"Love? It's Xander. He wants to talk to you," Spike said, blocking the doorway. My eyes widened as I felt my body tense up. "I told him that if he did anything to upset you, I'd bite him myself."
I smiled and nodded. "I don't think it'll come to that, but thanks for the offer," I replied, clenching my fists as I watched him step aside, Xander walking in.
The pain was still there, in his eyes, but there was a hint of understanding that made me hopeful. Lingering near the doorway, he glanced back and forth between me and Spike, swallowing hard.
"Spike," I said, "could you give us a minute?"
"You sure?" the vampire asked.
I nodded. "Yeah. We'll be okay."
"I'll be down the hall if you need me, just rifling through Angel's things," he assured me, before slipping out, shutting the door behind him and leaving me alone with my best friend.
There was a long, uncomfortable silence, before he finally spoke. "Will…I don't know where to start…I…"
"It's okay, Xander," I said.
"No…No, it's not okay. Nothing is okay about this. I mean…You…You're a…and I…"
He took a step forward as he spoke, the words hurried, his voice shaking, and then he suddenly stopped, looking unsure and glancing behind him.
I gave him a sad smile. "It's okay, Xander. You can come over here," I said, sitting down on the bed. "I won't bite. I have my soul."
"I know," he said, sighing and moving to sit beside me. "Angel told us. I just…We didn't…"
"What you saw down there…I…I lost control. I was surprised, and…"
"Yeah, so were we," he said.
"I would never hurt you," I whispered.
Xander nodded. "I know that, and I'm sorry…If I hurt you. It…It might take a while, for me to deal with this and be okay with it," he told me.
My shoulders slumped a little. "I know. I understand, if you can't…"
"But you will ALWAYS be my best friend," he insisted, his voice harsh and strong. "Don't ever doubt that. You will always be my Willow."
"Thank you," I whispered as he pulled me into a hug. I closed my eyes and inhaled, smelling the unique scent that screamed of Xander and childhood memories and everything safe and innocent.
"I love you, Will."
"I love you so much," I said him, pulling back as I heard another knock on the door, Angel walking in a moment later.
"Sorry to interrupt," he said. "We need you to come downstairs." There was something in his voice. Something…foreboding.
"What's wrong?"
"It's The Initiative," he's said, my heart dropping at the words. "They're on their way here."
~Part: 26~
With Angel before me, Spike at my side, and Xander just behind, holding my hand, I slowly descended the stairs, scanning the small group of people below.
"They're coming," Riley said, gesturing toward a small radio receiver clipped to his waist. "They know about Willow. They know that she was turned. They're coming to take her."
"Well, they're going to have one hell of a fight on their hands," Spike said, a deep growl in his voice.
"Weapons," Doyle suggested. "We'll need to gather up all of the weapons we can find."
"Just hand me a sword and point me toward the bad guy," Xander mumbled, squeezing my hand.
"You don't understand," Riley said. "They're sending an entire army, and they won't leave without her."
"You've never had two pissed off master vampires, a witch, a slayer and a…whatever the hell the mick is, fighting on your side," Spike reminded him.
"No, the boy's right," Angel argued. "There will be too many of them. We need a plan."
"Kinda running out of time for that," Xander said, tapping his watch.
Releasing his hand, I moved toward Buffy, who had not yet said a word, and was simply staring at me.
"I have a good plan," Cordelia offered, raising her hand. "Run and hide!"
Angel shook his head. "It's too late for that."
"Buffy?" I whispered, stepping up to her and waiting as she continued to stare.
"What about Adam? Huh?" Cordelia asked. "You can't fight him. He's like a giant, impermeable wall of demony badness."
"He's got to have a soft spot," Angel surmised. "We just need to figure out what it is."
Riley shook his head. "Professor Walsh created him to be…Well, I'm not sure exactly why she created him, but…"
"She created him to take over the world!" Spike shouted.
"No. I mean, I know that what she's done is wrong…So wrong, but…"
Spike moved toward the former soldier, growling as he stepped up, nearly nose to nose with him. "You'd better decide right now whose side you're on."
"Buffy…" I whispered again, before she interrupted.
"Will, I'm…Oh god, I'm so sorry. I didn't…I never should have…The stake, it was…"
"I know," I said, a relieved smile on my face. "I'm sorry I almost ate you. You know that I would never…"
"I know," she said, warmth bleeding back into her expression. "Angel told us that you have a soul. It's just…It's not every day that you find out that your best friend is a demon, sired by your former lover. It's a lot to take in."
"Tell me about it," I said with a chuckle.
"Spike," Angel growled, shoving the blond away from Riley. "We don't have time for this."
"I just want to be sure that when the battle starts, soldier-boy here isn't suddenly staking me in the back."
"Hey!" Riley shouted. "I'm here to help. What happened to Willow was…"
"Enough!" I shouted, startling everyone into a sudden silence. "This isn't helping. They're coming, and guess what? They aren't bickering the whole way here. You know what they're doing? They're planning on exactly how to take us out, one by one."
"Willow…"
"No! There's no more time for arguing. How long until they get here?"
"Probably three hours," Riley said, glancing at his watch. "They're assembling the units right now, but it's taking more time than usual; seems someone keeps scrambling the signal." With a smirk, he tapped the receiver on his belt.
"Okay," I said, rubbing my palms together as I began to piece together a strategy. "Riley and Xander, start barricading the entrances. When they get here we want it to be as difficult as possible for them to get in. Cordy, go to the basement and turn off the main power circuit. The darker the better. While you're down there, make sure the sewer tunnels are sealed off. A-and be careful. It's been flooding down there. When you shut the power down, don't electrocute-" Suddenly a thought struck me and I quickly turned toward the blond vampire. "Spike, I need you to go to my room and find those blue-prints on Adam. And bring me the spell book on my bed. I'll also need the two candles on the bottom shelf of the night stand, and the bag of crushed herbs next to them. Angel, show Doyle where the weapons are, and then get your car ready to go."
"Go?" Xander asked. "Go where?"
"Back to Sunnydale," I said, distracted as I looked at an electrical socket on the wall.
"No!" Buffy boomed, startling me. "No way, Will. We are not going back there."
"You're right," I said, giving her a sad smile. "We're not. I am."
"Not without me you're not," Spike argued, Angel stepping up behind him, nodding.
"Willow, you can't go there. What are you thinking?"
"I'm thinking that they're sending their whole little army here, to find me, which means that their compound will be nearly deserted. It's the best chance I'll have to finish this, once and for all."
"I'm going with you," Angel and Spike both shouted at the same time, turning and glaring at one another.
"Willow," Buffy began, before I cut her off.
"I have to do this," I told her, praying that she would understand. "I need you to stay here, stall them as long as possible. Please, Buffy…"
I watched as she considered my plea, her jaw clenching and unclenching, until finally her shoulders slumped slightly, and I knew she was giving in. "What about the chip?" she asked. "Angel told us that Walsh said you have a chip to control you. That could be a liability. If she can…"
"Buffy, I can't stop fighting because she might be able to manipulate me. They've taken everything from me. Everything! If I stop fighting…they win."
"What if she turns you into her own personal weapon, like Adam?"
I shrugged. "I won't let that happen. There's something else I need to do, and I need your help. It should only take a few minutes, but I need to borrow a little bit of the old slayer strength, literally, if you're willing…"
"Of course," she whispered with a smile. "Anything for my best friend."
~*~
The metal door slid shut and the elevator began its descent. Clenching my fists at my side, I closed my eyes, centering myself. I had no illusions about what we were walking into. They would have known the moment that we entered the compound. The fact that we were able to get to the elevator so easily was not necessarily a good thing. We were walking right into a trap, and we knew it.
"You're sure that you're up to this?" Angel asked, gripping a small sword tightly.
"I don't have much of a choice right now," I told him, staring at the shiny silver metal of the wall in front of me.
A moment later, the elevator stopped with a jolt, and I jumped as the main overhead lights went out, dim red emergency lights flickering on. The door had yet to open.
"Well that can't be good," Spike grumbled as the three of us stared ahead, waiting for something to happen.
~*~
Buffy stepped back from the front window, frowning. "You weren't kidding about the whole army thing," she said. "It's like they're ready to fight some epic battle. I'm just waiting for them to wheel in a big wooden horse."
The group jumped as Doyle came clattering down the stairs, grinning an apology.
"Sorry `bout that," he said, grabbing an axe and moving to stand beside Cordelia. "Had to make a phone call."
"Why aren't they moving?" Cordelia hissed through clenched teeth. "It's been hours."
Buffy shook her head. "It doesn't make sense. You wanna hit vampires, you hit during the day. I don't know what they're waiting for."
"Unless they know," Riley said, his expression tense. "Unless they know that Willow isn't here."
~*~
"You understand the plan?" Angel asked, frowning as we waited for something to happen.
I scowled. "I MADE the plan; of course I understand it."
"You're sure this is a good idea? I mean, if it doesn't work…"
"It'll work," I assured him, offering an encouraging grin as I felt Spike lay a hand on my shoulder from behind. "We expected them to know when we got here. It doesn't change anything. I just need one clear shot. There's more than enough electricity running through this place. I zap him with a good amount and it'll fry the main motherboard and kill the working organs. It's perfect."
Taking a deep, unneeded breath, I turned and looked at Spike. "After tonight," I whispered, shaking slightly "we'll be free."
He nodded, swallowing hard, and dropped his gaze to the floor. "I'm sorry," he replied. "You deserve better than this…Than all this. If I had been able to protect you…"
"Spike," I interrupted, place a finger over his lips, "there's no where I'd rather be right now, than right here with you." Jumping as I heard a loud noise outside, I turned my head, glancing over my shoulder. "Well, a quiet island in the middle of no where would be nice, too."
"When this is over, I'm taking you away from here," he promised, squeezing my hands in his. "I'll show you the world. Italy. Can't wait to take you to a quiet little villa in Italy."
"Sounds perfect," I whispered, arching up and kissing him softly, just before the elevator doors slid open.
~*~
"Put down your weapons and come out with your hands up!" a man called from outside. "You are surrounded. Surrender and you will be unharmed!"
"Remember," Buffy said, voice shaking slightly, "do not engage unless first provoked. We want to avoid violence as long as possible."
"Yeah," Xander said, shrugging. "Maybe they just wanna talk."
"This is your last warning," the soldier yelled. "If you do not come out, unarmed, action will be taken."
"Then again, maybe they want to kill us all," Xander muttered.
They waited, breathless, until a sudden blast blew the door from its hinges, revealing a small army of soldiers silhouetted by a bright spotlight.
"You shouldn't have done that," Buffy hissed, a large sword shining in her grasp.
"Do you think that will stop us?" the soldier asked, gesturing toward her weapon.
"No, but this might slow you down," Xander answered, hoisting a large automatic rifle up onto his shoulder, aiming at the other man.
"Where did we get that?" Cordelia whispered to Doyle.
He shrugged, shifting uncomfortably from foot to foot and glancing at his watch. "I didn't ask."
"Stand down," the soldier barked, aiming his own rifle at Xander.
"Funny," Riley said, pulling out another large, automatic weapon, "that was going to be my line."
"Put the weapon down," the soldier demanded. Riley simply shook his head. "Put it down!" Still, he didn't move. "Riley, man," the soldier said, faltering slightly, his tone softening, "it's not too late, you don't have to do this."
"Actually, I do," he replied, glancing toward Buffy. "What the Initiative is doing isn't right."
"They're demons, man! The girl is a vampire!" the soldier shouted.
"She has a soul," Riley insisted.
"So what? She's still just a-"
"I'd watch your mouth, if I were you," Xander growled.
"You've made your choice," the man hissed, backing up to join his unit. "It's unfortunate that you won't live to regret it."
~*~
The hallway, like the elevator, was bathed in a dim, red glow, silent and unnerving. Slowly, cautiously making our way down the corridor, we listened for signs of life, pausing just before the entrance to the large, open pit that I'd seen my first time in the compound.
Looking around, I saw no signs of life, nodding to the other two vampires and slowly stepping into the pit. Nudging Spike, I gestured toward the containment cells. They were empty.
Something was definitely not right.
The bright, overhead lights clicked on as I felt Angel and Spike back up into me, keeping a tight perimeter as we scanned the area.
"Ms Rosenberg, so nice to see you again." I heard her voice before I saw her, my dead heart dropping into my stomach. My eyes narrowed and I clenched my jaw as I saw Maggie step out, Adam just behind her.
"I wish I could say the same," I said, suddenly wishing I had my own weapon to hold. It wasn't that I needed it. My weapon was stored internally, but sometimes a big gun just makes a girl feel more secure. Looking around, I wondered where her soldiers were. Surely she hadn't sent all of them to L.A.
"They're here if I need them," she told me, clearly reading my thoughts. "I was hoping that we could come to an understanding without more violence."
"I wouldn't count on that," I growled.
"Come now," she said, grinning slightly. "You're a rational young woman. Surely you know that you cannot win this."
"I'm an evil thing, remember?" I spat. "Rationality has no place here."
"You could do great things, Willow," she said, turning and looked toward her creation. "Just like my Adam, here."
"He was created to destroy mankind and rule the earth in some sick, demented vision of a demonic utopia," I said through clenched teeth.
"As were you," he replied. I flinched at the words, as if he'd slapped me, shaking slightly as rage surged through me. "You were created, like me, to be something better than them…Better than mere human or demon. We are above them." I shook my head, trying to ignore his words. "We have strength that they will never know, and yet you turn your back on it. That is a shame."
"So where does that leave us?" I asked, casually centering myself and drawing in as much energy as I could.
"If you will not work with us, then you must be destroyed," Maggie stated, her tone very matter-of-fact.
Holding my hands out to the side, I smiled, my eyes going black. "I was hoping you would say that."
~*~
"There are innocent people here!" Buffy shouted.
"You cannot be allowed to interfere with the cause," the soldier told her.
"You'll kill innocents to further yourselves? Where does that fit in with your cause?"
"It is unfortunate," he said, "but then, so is the way that you have poisoned Finn's mind."
"Hey! I didn't…" Before she could finish, the man motioned to the rest of the unit and the all prepared to fire.
"Whoa!" Xander shouted. "Let's just settled down for a minute and…"
"We need backup," Riley mumbled as a thunderous sound rose up from behind the troupes.
"Ask and ya shall receive," Doyle said with a smirk, watching as a large group of assorted demons descended upon the Initiative army.
"What the hell is that?" Xander asked, eyes wide as he watched the soldiers turn, training their weapons on the hordes of demons.
"I called in a few favors," Doyle explained as the demons attacked, their strength and numbers clearly overpowering the soldiers as the men tried in vain to defend themselves.
~*~
"You know that you can end this right now," Professor Walsh said, taking a step back.
"I plan to," I hissed, keeping my hands held out at my sides.
"You cannot fight me. I made you."
"No," I argued, "you didn't make me. Angel made me what I am. You…You may have upped my learning aptitude, but you didn't give me anything."
"There is a chip in your head," she said, her tone even and calm. "I need only to push a single button and you will do as I command."
"You cannot enslave living beings to fight your crusade!"
"You aren't living anymore, from what they tell me. You were a smart girl, a fast learner. You could have gone far. The way you took to the strength enhancements, you're magic could have been beyond anyone else on this Earth, and I gave that to you."
"Yes," I said, my tone matching hers, "and I really should thank you for that. If you hadn't given that to me, I would never have managed to remove this." Holding out my hand, I turned my palm up, revealing a small, blinking piece of metal.
Maggie's eyes widened. "How did you-"
"Like you said, I'm a fast learner," I growled.
"Chip or no chip, you will not win," she insisted.
"I'm gonna have to disagree with you on that one," I hissed, raising my hands and drawing in as much energy as I could.
"Stop her!" she shouted.
Adam moved, but thanks to my handy-dandy vampire speed, I was faster, and made it to the woman before he made it to me, quickly reaching out and gripping her throat tightly. I could feel the energy that I'd drawn in, swirling through me, waiting for me to work its will. Unfortunately, that was going to have to wait.
I grinned as she coughed and sputtered, struggling in my grasp, her futile attempts to break free only spurring my hatred and lust for her blood.
"I'm sure that you know the story of Frankenstein," I whispered against her ear, watching Adam out of the corner of my eye. "It never ends well for the doctor."
I saw Adam move toward me, just a second before Angel stepped between us, growling at the larger creature.
"Why don't you pick on someone your own size," he said, vampire visage slipping forth.
Adam looked around the large room, shrugging. "There is no one here that is even close to my size."
Angel glanced over his shoulder as Spike snickered. "Then…why don't you pick on…oh, forget it. It's gonna to be fun to beat you to death." Rushing forward, he pulled his arm back, punching with every bit of strength he had, gasping as Adam easily side-stepped and backhanded him, sending the vampire flying several feet across the shining floor.
"You're right," Adam said. "This will be fun."
"You belong to me!" Walsh gurgled, wincing as my grip tightening slightly. "I gave you those powers!"
"And I think it's rather fitting that I'm going to kill you with them," I hissed, my demonic features slipping forward as I reared back, ready to rip open her throat and spill her blood.
"Willow, no!" Angel shouted, just as Adam reached down, grabbing the vampire by the collar of his shirt and hoisting him up. "You don't want to do this!" Shoving him back into the wall, Adam stared in shock as Angel brought his knees up, pushing off of the wall and slammed both feet into the monster's chest, causing him to lose his grip on the vampire and stumble backwards.
I glanced up, rolling my eyes as Angel took several steps toward me, Spike at his side, Adam moving behind them.
"Let her have at it," Spike growled. "That bitch is the one that did this to her. Let her see what happens when you mess with demons."
"She has a soul, Spike. She'll suffer if she-"
"Oops," I whispered, a loud crack silencing them. They both looked up as the body fell from my hands, head twisted to the side at an unnatural angel. My eyes were black, my fangs to the fore as I smiled coyly. "Daddy, I think I broke my toy."
"Willow," Angel whispered, stepping forward, before Spike stopped him.
I paused, faltering as I shook my head, teetering on unstable legs, and looked down at the body.
"Oh god, I…"
Spike was immediately at my side, holding me upright. "It's okay, love. She deserved it."
"Spike," Angel began to argue.
"No!" the blond shouted. "Look at what she's done. She needed to be stopped…permanently. You did the right thing, Red."
I closed my eyes, my stomach roiled. "I think I'm going to be sick."
"You will learn to accept it, over time," Adam said, reminding me of his presence. "Killing is part of the natural order."
"Oh yeah?" Angel asked. "Then why the hell won't you just die?"
In response, Adam easily backhanded him again, sending him crashing to the floor, several feet away.
Watching with wide eyes as my sire was knocked across the room, I growled, seeing red. Holding up my hands, I screamed as I heard the lights overhead shatter, tiny shards of glass raining down on us, the sound as they hit the cement floor a mockery of a spring shower.
"Yes," Adam said with a smile, "let your true power loose."
"I intend to," I growled, hissing as Spike jumped him from behind, holding on as the creature spun around, trying to knock him lose. Glancing up, I saw the power lines running over head, connecting the open operatories with the main power supply.
"Spike!" I shouted. "Let go!" I held my hands up toward the ceiling, hitting the wires and cables with a strong blast of magic, watching as they snapped and sparked, tearing and breaking, a few ends hanging down, blue sparks dancing on the frayed metal.
Looking back toward Adam, I saw that he had Spike, his hand around his throat. Angel was still down for the count, and I knew we had little time.
Spinning around, I hit Adam with a strong surge of magic, watching as he dropped the blond vampire and stumbled, swaying back and forth before looking up at me with a smile.
"Is that the best you can do?" he asked.
"I'm just getting started," I growled, holding out my hands and releasing another bolt of power.
Moving faster than his mass should have allowed, he stepped to the side, the magic blast hitting the wall just above Spike's head, and Adam lunged toward me.
Holding up a hand, I watched with satisfaction as he hit an invisible field, his fist bouncing off of it.
"Interesting," he murmured, considering his options.
Dragging himself up, Angel moved behind the monster, ready to attack, but unable to move fast enough as Adam turned and hit him, the vampire over a gurney and into a tray of instruments in one of the operatories.
Grabbing a scalpel, Angel stood up and threw it, eyes widening as Adam easily caught the object and quickly threw it back, just missing Angel as he ducked out of the way.
"As much as I do enjoy the violence," Adam said, moving toward Angel, "this is starting to grow tiresome." Reaching across the gurney, he grabbed the vampire by the throat and hauled him forward before throwing him up and away, Angel landing in an unmoving heap across the pit.
Moving toward me again, Adam was stopped by Spike as he jumped between us, wiping at the small bit of blood that trickled from a split lip.
"Let's finish this," he growled.
"Gladly," Adam countered, a long, sharp wooden skewer springing out from one arm as he lunged toward the blond.
I tried to move as Spike backed up, hitting my protection field, which I quickly dropped. With a growl, he ran forward, ready to hit Adam, but the larger demon-hybrid moved to the side, grabbing the vampire by the back of the neck and throwing him across the room, to land near Angel.
Gasping, I jumped, my back hitting a wall as Adam turned on me, his arm lunging forward, the wooden skewer only a few inches from my chest.
"It appears that your magic is not enough to stop me," he said.
"No," Spike mumbled from behind, "but this is." Grabbing one of the live wires, he thrust it forward, his fist slamming into the back of the demon, hitting a seam and breaking through, electricity coursing into the monsters body.
Spike stepped between Adam and me as Adam shook and screamed, the smell of burnt flesh and frying metal filling the air. I looked up toward the blond, a smile on my lips.
We'd finally stopped them.
Spike grinned, a moment before his face fell, his eyes wide with shock and fear. My gaze traveled down to where his hands clutched his chest, and I saw it, my heart dropping. There, protruding from his chest, was the wooden skewer, which Adam had thrust straight through his heart before dropping forward.
My eyes burned with tears as he looked up, whispering, "I'm sorry," and then he was gone, a cloud of dust settling to the floor.
"No!" I screamed, my voice echoing around me, as I dropped to my knees, my hands clutching at the small bit of dust. "Spike, no!"
I cursed the magic that still swirled around me for its inability to bring him back, my eyes still disbelieving…one moment he was there, the next minute…nothing. My eyes were still black, my heart still unbeating, and I wanted nothing more than to reach into the depths of hell, calling on all the power I could muster and bring him back.
Shoving Adam's charred body aside, Angel knelt beside me, and though I first tried to resist him, I eventually fell into his embrace, sobbing as my heart broke.
As originally planned, we eventually stumbled out of the building, burning the entire compound until nothing remained. Buffy and Xander faired better than us, standing back as the demons destroyed the Initiative army, eventually driving the few remaining survivors out of the city. There were no casualties among the small group inside Angel's home. I wish we'd all been that lucky.
~*~
Twilight is my favorite time of day. The sky has yet to go completely dark, reds and oranges and deep blues mingling with the moon and stars as they fade in overhead. The rolling Tuscan hills darken to a deep green as night falls.
Leaning against the worn wooden rail, I smile sadly as the last bits of warm daylight disappear, the sound of soft footfalls altering me to the fact that I'm not alone.
"Here you are," Angel says, stepping up behind me and wrapping his arms around my cool body. "I was wondering where you'd wandered off to."
"Just needed some time to think," I tell him, leaning back against his strong chest. "I talked to Xander today." He listens, silently, as I continue. "His oldest son got into college. You should hear him. He's so proud."
"I'll bet," Angel murmurs.
"Dawnie's baby is due any day, and they've finally decided on a name. She says Buffy if it's a girl, and William, for a boy."
"Good, strong names," he says, and I can tell without looking that he's smiling.
"I thought so."
"Are you ever sorry?" he asks.
Turning in his embrace, I look up, unable to hide the sadness that still lingers in my eyes.
"We've been over this," I tell him. "I'm not sorry. I miss him, them, everyday, but I'll never be sorry for asking you to turn me. It was the right thing."
Returning my smile, he pulls me closer, kissing the top of my head.
"It helps," I tell him, "to see them living, happy. It helps, and it heals."
The End